Christmas Hangover

I've been trying to catch up on sleep the last couple of days and so I haven't gotten around to posting on any of my blogs. I intended to post Christmas recap pictures and all that. Instead here's a summary of highlights.

The boys woke up about 15 minutes after my 5 am post, so I didn't have to wait long (Little Fish has been sleeping very poorly lately - hence the need to catch up on sleep). We had hot chocolate and looked through stockings. Beeper was thrilled to find a General Lee (he loves Dukes of Hazzard) in his stocking. Little Fish was just thrilled at the idea of pulling things out and at the sight of candy.

Beeper spotted big presents under the tree and suggested we commence with opening them. He was thrilled with everything. Little Fish, who we thought would love unwrapping presents (especially since he kept trying to unwrap them before Christmas) got bored with the concept after about the second present. He preferred running around playing guns. His brother happily helped with opening up the rest.

We took a break about halfway through the presents for breakfast when the pull-apart was done. One of the highlights of the day for me was at breakfast when Beeper suggested we should say a prayer to tell Jesus to have a happy birthday.

Daddy put together Little Fish's new kitchen (note: in future years check big presents ahead of time for amount of assembly required). Beeper said several times, "Little Fish, you have to share this with me." (Would anyone like to guess how Beeper reacted when Little Fish got too close to his toys?) We finished opening the last of the presents.

It was a good day, and Beeper was thrilled with everything. We spent a couple of hours at his cousins' house that afternoon. Beeper beat his oldest cousin bowling on their Wii (it was his first time playing; we told him his Bogey would be proud). The excitement, combined with lack of sleep and real food, finally overwhelmed him and he broke down on the way out the door.

We took him home, fed him, and spent a relaxed evening watching movies and shooting Little Fish's kitchen with everyone's new nerf guns. It was a good day.

Waiting for Santa

Of course Santa visited our house as soon as the boys were in bed last night. But it turns out I am still a kid at Christmas, and my favorite part is looking forward to the reactions to carefully picked out presents. So I sit here at 5 in the morning. Normally around this time I am hoping, praying that the boys sleep in. This morning, though, I am wondering when they will get up, and whether they will sit on my lap for a bit first or go straight for their stockings. Despite our best efforts not to, I am afraid we did end up spoiling them this year, and I look forward to the discovery and excitement of each surprise.

Here's wishing you a day filled with love and family. Merry Christmas!

Unsolicited Advice

There is a great article about unsolicited advice over at the Freedom to Learn blog (Psychology Today). Here's a taste:

My wife and I have a wonderful marriage. One cause of our bliss is that we have both learned to avoid giving the other person unwanted advice. I remember one early step in that learning process for me. We were coming home from a movie, and my wife was driving. I noticed that she was keeping the car in second gear when she clearly should have shifted to third, maybe even to fourth. Stupidly, I told her so. She didn't say anything, but her curt manner of shifting and the silence I heard for the next few minutes spoke volumes. It said, among other things: "Look, buddy, I've been driving for years; I don't need you to micromanage my driving; and if you think you're going to get lucky tonight you've got another think coming!" All that, just from my polite, "Sweetie, I think you should be in a higher gear here; you'd get better gas mileage that way and it would be easier on the engine." I had to admit, as I thought about it, that if she had given similar advice to me, my unspoken reaction would have been the same (except for the part about not getting lucky).

...

Sometimes, of course, unsolicited advice is welcome. If I'm stepping into the ocean and someone, anyone, comes over and advises me not to swim there because sharks were spotted there a few minutes age, I'm grateful. I hear this not so much as advice as useful, potentially life-saving information, which I didn't know before. I'd feel even more grateful, though, without even the slightest tinge of annoyance, if the Good Samaritan had entirely omitted the advice part of the message (to not swim there) and just given me the information part (about the sharks). Then I'd feel that a decision to stay out of the water was entirely my own, based on my own capacity to think rationally, and was not in any way coerced. I wouldn't, then, have even the slightest temptation to continue into the water just to prove that "I'll do whatever I blankety blank well choose to do, thank you!"

I have always been a know-it-all (I know you're surprised, right?) but over the last year or so I have been making a conscious effort to not be, especially to not point out people's mistakes if it's not absolutely necessary. I'm still working at it, but I have noticed it makes a huge difference, especially with my family, when I remember to keep my mouth shut and that they don't need pointed out to them every little thing they do wrong.

Of course, sometimes it's just the way it's said that makes a difference. Like the extreme example about the sharks, useful information offered at the right time in the right way is much better accepted.

What's your take on advice, solicited or not?

Thankful Thursday

Tonight I have Bing Crosby from White Christmas running through my mind: If you're worried, and you can't sleep, try counting blessings instead of sheep, and you'll fall asleep counting your blessings.

Normally I try to find new things to be thankful for every week, as a reminder of how blessed I am. I am truly grateful to be surrounded by so many blessings, but right now I just want to focus on the basics, what I am always thankful for but seldom mention: I am so thankful for all of my boys. They fill my life with joy and there is nothing I could want more. I am thankful we are all here safe together and that we have very few places we need to be for the next week and a half. That is the best Christmas present of all.

Dangerous New Hobby

(The dark chocolate peanutbutter cups are especially perilous.)

Muffin Tin Monday

This week's tin had a Christmas tree theme, sort of. There was a tree-shaped sandwich, doritos, milk, unshelled almonds (so he could use the nutcracker), carrot "ornaments" and a Christmas cookie.

For more muffin tins check out:

Thankful Friday

I am thankful for Amoxocillan.
I am thankful for frozen juice concentrate.
I am thankful for canned cinnamon rolls.
I am thankful for the chance to relax and spend some one-on-one time with Beeper for a couple hours yesterday.
I am thankful for my new chair.
I am thankful for traditions and getting to make new ones.
I am thankful for Beeper's giving attitude.
I am thankful for onlline recipe collections.
I am thankful for google.
I am thankful for six years (and counting) of being married to the greatest guy on the planet.

Need to scream

(Note: Any use of the term "you" in this post is not directed at my readers. This is a mix of frustrations at some different people.)

It should be Thankful Thursday, but I've got to get this out. Excuse me while I vent.

BACK OFF!!!!!

You have made it clear that I am strict where I should be lenient and lenient where I should be strict. I am sure you did a fine job raising your kids, but these are not your kids. These are my kids. I know where their boundaries need to be. I am around them almost every minute of every day. I know them better than anyone, except Heavenly Father, of course, whom I try to ask for advice on a regular basis. I am not perfect, and I don't know everything, but He trusts me with these little boys. I wish you could too.

The least you could do is keep your doubts to yourself. Please stop trying to interfere. If I want your advice, I'll ask for it. Did you know that every time you leave my house, it takes me two days to reassert my authority with my boys? Every. Single. Time. That is something I can do without.

Please just BACK OFF

Birthday photos

First order of business was to open his present from Mama and Daddy:

Our cupcakes were not quite as cute as the ones in the magazine, but they were tasty. (It was Beeper's idea to use the silly feet cups.)

Grandma and Grandpa arrived late in the afternoon with more presents.

The church party was that night, and of course the highlight of the evening for the kids was a visit from Santa and Mrs. Claus. Beeper somehow ended up on Mrs. Claus' lap while she gave her little presentation. (The party was great, btw. Jenni did a great job putting it together. I wish I had gotten some pictures of firebirdluver reading.)

Beeper waited until after we got in the car to go home to say, "Guess what. I knew that was Grandma and Grandpa the whole time."

Not everyone had such a great weekend. Little Fish was miserable all day Friday, so on Saturday we took him in to the doctor. It turned out he had a major ear infection in both ears. Poor little guy. He is feeling much better now, though.

Muffin Tin Monday

The muffin tin theme for the whole month is holidays. Christmas is a theme we never get tired of at our house. This week the boys had gingerbread graham crackers (have you tried those yet? yummy), chocolate pudding with Christmas sprinkles, pretzels with peanut butter, bananas and train shaped toast. Not surprisingly, they gobbled this up quickly.

For more muffin tins, head over here:

Five

We have officially hit the world of big kid. We have a "school-age" child in the house. It's hard to believe.

I am really glad Beeper is still young enough to not mind the way his birthday coincides with the Christmas season. He fell in love with the reindeer cupcakes in Family Fun, so that's what he wants for his birthday cake. The advent calendar is a convenient way to mark the passage of time to his birthday as well as Christmas. He doesn't realize that one of the reasons he isn't having a birthday party (at least not the invite friends over kind of party) is that this weekend is just too packed full of Christmas parties and other things. There just wouldn't be time for a party.

That's not the only reason. We did consider a party, but firebirdluver and I both grew up with very few birthday parties, so we aren't sold on the idea that it is an essential part of childhood. Beeper has only been to one or two parties for other kids, and since he doesn't go to school he doesn't hear the talk about other kids' parties, so I don't think a party really occurs to him as something he needs. Not yet, anyway. Most of his experience with birthdays involves going over to his cousins' to celebrate with their family. Hopefully celebrating with family is what he views as normal for a long time.

And maybe he won't ever mind having his birthday so close to Christmas either. I guess just because it makes other people bitter doesn't mean it has to bother him.

There are definite signs of awareness creeping in with age, though. He has been able to hold the idea of a birthday in his mind and anticipate it. He has understood for some time that he would be turning five soon, which is a big contrast to last year, when we had to put some effort into training him with the right answer and number of fingers when someone asked him his age.

Yesterday morning he asked, "Is it my birthday yet?"

"No," I told him. "Tomorrow is your birthday."

"Aww. I want today to be my birthday. I just can't wait to turn five."

Thankful Thursday

I am thankful for four-wheel drive.
I am thankful for a four-wheeler with a snow plow.
I am thankful for paper snowflakes.
I am thankful for Kleenex.
I am thankful for naptime.

Scout Reach

We've been asked to participate in the "scout reach" program for a few months. I had never heard of it before. It involves going to the Boys and Girls Club every week and doing scout-type activities with them.

It's not like a typical Cub Scout den or pack, because there are different kids every week, and we don't work on advancements with them. The girls are welcome, as are the older kids if they want to participate.

We're going to hold a pinewood derby race with them. Usually the point of the pinewood derby race (like everything else in cub scouts) is for the kids to spend time with their parents building the cars. The assumption here, though, is that parents may not have the time or means. Plus since attendance is not consistent, well, we don't want to be sending home a bunch of car kits we will never see again. So the cars are being built there at the meetings. I have been helping them design the cars and transfer their lines onto the wood, and firebirdluver brings one of his saws to cut them out. This week some of the kids will be ready to start sanding (this is our third week there).

We love building pinewood derby cars, so it's a lot of fun to help these kids and see their designs. It will also be fun to see a pinewood derby race where no one has the advantage of more "help" or fancier tools (or cars bought online; did you know there are people who sell finished cars? kind of defeats the purpose, doesn't it?)

It is a pretty cool program, and hopefully it is a good experience for our whole family (of course we've been bringing the boys with us). I just hope we aren't taking on more than we can do.